Walmart Beard Oil Review

Dear Sam Walton, I look forward to challenging you to a duel when I see you. I carry my face slapping glove in my back pocket for just the occasion. I thought Walgreen’s did the piss poorest job possible at trying to help a man and his beard out but then you showed up.

Cremo

First let’s look at their exclusive beard oil Cremo Tea Tree Mintproduct with an awe inspiring name “Cremo”. I don’t know about you but with a name like that aren’t you shaking in anticipation to put that crap on your face. Now, I’m the first one to look past some horrible flaw and see the real substance of something. Just not my more than medium husky ex who could make a mean meatball but who knows what the heck they are putting in this thing. They claim that they throw in a few quality ingredients but if you find out exactly how much there is in there before I do then feel free to reach out. My guess is that it’s a drop of the good stuff and the rest is eal farts. This product’s biggest claim and selling proposition is that it’s not tested on animals, do you have any idea how hard it would be to test a product on an animal if you wanted to. You would basically have to buy a private island off the coast of Africa and breed your own genetically mutated species. Thanks but no thanks.

my recommendations

BB Super Grow With Vitamin E

BB Super Grow Hair ProductBut wait there’s a late entry in the Walmart race for crappiest beard product. Now this particular gem is hard to find, made me feel like one of those weird Pokemon kids looking for the cat one that kicks everyones ass. I almost gave up until I accidentally tripped over it, they apparently made a nice display of it, or should I say they had one tub left sitting next to an aged gallon sized LA Looks. Now if you can’t tell that this is just a bottle of shea butter with the packaging fingernail scrapped off and a beard balm sticker slapped on then I don’t know what to tell you. By far the winner of all the loser products.

Go check out my post on shaving with a straight edge, you’ll never use it but this link will help me rank better.

Beard Man
Beard Man

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